Dearest Beyaki:
Before you begin to think that we are out to bash you, just know that JW and I LOVED the Beyonce’ Experience Concert. We used to watch it on mute religiously. It was actually one of our favorite past times (second to drinking Dazzle) but that’s not why we’re here today.
It has come to our attention that you and your brand are everywhere. It’s almost like we can’t escape you, and while that is great as a marketing scheme, we the American people are tired of seeing you and your yaki everywhere with lackluster performances. We loved Dangerously in Love, patted our weave to B’Day but you have fallen short with this I am… Creole Sasha Fierce disc set that you are trying to force get us to buy.
Anyhoo, to my real point… oh yeah. Let it GO boo! Whoever helped you write these songs, tell them “That Ain’t It!” and better luck next time. Also please refrain from acting. I stomached a bootleg of Cadillac Record cause I refused to place more “bengji’s” in your pockets plus, I won’t contribute to anything less than the best and your acting well… it ain’t the best boo. But as a Christian I feel compelled to tell you to Be Encouraged. Just because you didn’t sell out your tour doesn’t mean you should feel bad. Listen to your fans, embrace your love for your man and I promise, we’ll be right there to buy your records keep you from falling to Ciara and Keri (cause we know that was you she was talking about).
Be Blessed Honey,
AN 
Dear Sherry (whitfield or whatever),
You=the worst possible example of Black women in Atlanta. I still really don’t understand how or why Bob owes you 7 figures for ….wait-what did you do exactly? And to be so ostentations as to publicize your greed is just classless and tacky and THAT is not an Atlanta woman. An real Atlanta woman would rise and thrive despite her circumstances which I’m guessing yours are a high school education and old lady face.
Next, this clothing line…She by Sherry, why? I wish there had been thought clouds revealing what Mychael Knight really thought about your designs. And I’m truly humored by the fact that you let a crackhead steal the show at your divorce party! I think the best thing you could’ve done for the party was not show up-truly-thank you.
All that being said, perhaps u can use your stripper skills and your fashion skills and make some lil shiny junts for the Magic City girls. They got money in this recession! And they pay cash mon-tee!!! In the future don’t act Augusta in Atlanta…the natives can tell.
Money is related to class only in the minds of those who have too much of the former, too little of the latter, or NONE of either….*let the choir say Amen*
Yours in Affluence,
JW
STOP THE TRACK! Did you know that Aaliyah was rockin the boat in a lace front???!!! I’m a little sad.